 |
| The handsomest horse |
Here's the thing. He came to me for a specific reason and he more than accomplished that. I wanted him to carry on and be a fancy show horse, and he's letting me know that as much as his heart is in it, his body won't hold up to it.
He was "sound" after a solid month of rehab. Sound until he wasn't. Sound until he was tired, and then he limped again.
The vet told me that there was no benefit to making him limp. It's not something he's going to work through. It's something that requires healing. Sometimes more. Sometimes less. Sometimes longer. Sometimes shorter.
 |
| Cuna, then Jake, then Wiley |
So Cuna moved to his new home--a giant pasture he shares with a couple of nice geldings. We pulled his shoes as per his farrier's advice and took away his grain. The old man hangs out and enjoys life. He has the other ladies at the barn wrapped around his goofy hooves and they love him. I visit him four or five days a week. I tell him about Courage and life at the track (as if he didn't know!) and I groom him, pick his feet, and scratch his itchy spots.
I look back at the pictures of our time together, and it makes me cry a little. I can still feel him taking me to the jumps, his red ears locked on with perfect focus. I feel the confidence and security that he taught me, and I know my life won't be the same now that he's been here.
My show friends keep asking when he's coming back. I tell them the same thing every time. He's taking a vacation. Maybe we'll hack around this fall. Then he's taking the winter off.
And that's it. I'm not making plans for him. I love him. He gave me more that I could have hoped for and I have no right to ask for something beyond that. Maybe I'll find another field for him that backs up to trails and he and I can explore the mountains like we used to. No more collection. No more drilling. That's my favorite dream. We'd both love it.
So we're healing together. At our own pace. And it's ok.
OMG, sniffle
ReplyDeleteit is a tough decision, but I suspect the right one.
ReplyDeleteYou still have his presence to enjoy so all is good with the world.
ReplyDeleteI have so much respect for you. You are very lucky to have Cuna -- the change in you as a horsewoman and rider has been drastic since he came into your life. You are so confident now! But he is lucky to have you too.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to accept when your partner can't do what you both want so badly to do...when the body can't keep up with the mind and the passion. It's also interesting (and incredibly hard) to be a part of the transition in your relationship. But I think your outlook is great. The best thing for Cuna (and you) is what you're doing - keep loving him, take advantage of his soundness when you can, and maybe, just maybe, he'll bounce back. If not, your relationship has evolved to another level that in some ways, is just as irreplaceable as everything he has taught you...I wouldn't trade the 3 years of on-again, off-again soundness with Promise, as heart-wrenching as they were a times. :)
ReplyDeletesounds Like A wonderful dream That I Have A Feeling Will Come True. That Is What You Love To Do Most With The Good man Anyways. You'll Have courage To Take You To The Jumps And cuna To explore The World With. I Think You Are Absolutely Doing The Right Thing And I Am Glad You Are Finding peace in It.
ReplyDeleteLovely dream and I'm with Amy, I have no doubt it will come to fruition.
ReplyDeleteAs lucky you feel to have had so many lovely experiences with Cuna, he is just as lucky to have an owner as understanding as you are. I'm sure most of us have seen the old packer show horses getting shot up with Legend and bute and heaven knows what else in the days leading up to and following shows. They deserve so much more than that. I think Cuna will let you know that you've made the right decision to let him rest and heal in comfort when you're able to re-enter the ring and do what you both love again.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like your head is in a good place. Sometimes I think it helps to have another project to focus on. At least for me - having Prair to focus on in terms of training/improving/etc made it much (MUCH) easier for me to let Pia be Pia and sort through things at the right pace for her.
ReplyDeleteI hope Cuna stays on the healing path, because I'm certain he has more lessons to teach!
This post has a lovely feel of calm and acceptance. As long as you can still spend time together, what more can you ask for? A fall of leisurely hackventures seems like the perfect dream.
ReplyDeleteThis post made me cry. You obviously love your horse and want what is best for him, which is so nice to hear about in today's world where I see people with the thought process of "we can bute/drug them sound enough to get around the ring and get another ribbon". It reminds me of the similar situation I was in when my heart horse needed to have a facility where he would have constant companionship and an unchanging environment, the opposite of what is available in boarding facilities in our area. I re homed him and he bow lives in MT with five other blind horses. Sometimes it breaks your heart, but as a true horsewoman knows, its all about the horse's needs, not our own wants.
ReplyDelete::hugs:: Maybe this is Cuna's opportunity for the career you've truly been preparing him for: modeling. He's such a cutie, you can let your friends put their tack and equipment on him for photo shoots to help them sell it! You can do more ninja apparel shoots, etc. Sounds like he is enjoying the chill life so far.
ReplyDeleteHe's lucky to have you :) What's meant to be will be!
ReplyDeleteSounds like your making the best decision for him. It must be hard but its good you are putting his needs first.
ReplyDeleteGreat post! He is lucky to have you! :) He defiantly came to you when you needed him most and I love that he was able to do so much for you!
ReplyDeleteSO much respect for your decision for him! So many people push their horse past their limit and cripple them forever (we have one at my barn, lovely, smart gelding that can barely walk sound at age 18 from years of hardcore eventing. It is heartbreaking). Showing should not be the priority. Human goals should not be the priority. The HORSE should be the priority and the fact that you are giving him the time and peace Cuna needs is so great!
ReplyDeleteOn behalf of Cuna: "Thank you."
ReplyDeleteYour love has no bounds.
Cuna has got to be one of the luckiest horses to have an owner as enlightened and compassionate as you. I am sure there are more happy trails in your future.
ReplyDeleteHe's very lucky to have you!
ReplyDeleteYou are his perfect partner. He is lucky to have a rider, owner, human-partner like you :)
ReplyDeleteThis is perfect. I have an enormous amount of respect for your decision. And it's fitting somehow, that Cuna gave you confidence, which led to Courage.
ReplyDeleteI agree with everyone else. I think this will be very good for both of you. You're lucky to have him!
ReplyDeleteEven if you can't do all the things you used to do with him, just being with that special horse in your life is fulfilling. My horse Phoenix has stepped down to almost all flat rides with the occasional tiny X. I wouldn't trade the time I've had with him for anything, even if he can't be the one that I do my hard riding with. I've actually found it to be fairly therapeutic, taking a break away from the work I do with Stampede and just enjoying and easy hack with my best equine friend several times a week. Some horses are just special. :)
ReplyDelete