Thursday, March 19, 2015

Ammy Life

bonus: horse is still cute
I want to write this post about how frustrated I am.

How my dressage riding isn't pretty.

My jump riding isn't effective enough.

My show budget is pathetic.

My lessons are infrequent.

My progress is stilted.

My goals are unreachable.

I'm calling a stirrup-length mulligan. Yay cute knees!
But you know what? I'm an adult ammy. I take lessons when I can afford it. I refuse to beat myself up for not looking like a jumper pro in my first jump lesson of the year. I looked like an adult ammy in my first lesson of the year on a green horse who'd only seen jumps about 4x in the last few months, AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE ARE.

Yeah, my dressage position isn't perfect. But you know what? It's effective for where we're at right now. I'm hardly a dressage pro, Courage is new to the whole idea, and the fact that he's progressing this quickly is a testament to the team he and I have become over the past year and a half.

I'm focusing on the positives--Courage is coming along great. We have homework to help fix the jumping. I'm excited about our dressage.

I'm not dwelling on the meta narratives here. I can't turn into one of those people who shows out of state year round and dumps buckets of money into nice made horses. I like those people, but I'm not one of them. I'm just me with my lil bay OTTB that I'm bringing along myself, and that's ok.



26 comments:

  1. You're speaking my language here, lady! :) I can't seem to get my hip angle to stay open, no matter what I do. It's so frustrating. I contemplated cutting my legs off and gluing them in the right place the other night. Then I realized I'd bleed to death and ruin my saddle.

    Priorities.

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    1. Bleeding to death is only acceptable if it both achieves perfection and doesn't ruin tack. I like your thought process.

      Besides, I'm the queen of opening my hip angle only to COMPLETELY collapse my upper body, hunchback-style.

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    2. My left hip is the only one that seems to be wanting to open. Or is it my right? Clearly I need all the help I can get :)

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  2. Courage is coming along great - and you seem to be really enjoying the journey with him, ups and downs alike. sounds pretty good to me!

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  3. FWIW, I think you and Courage are looking fantastic! I'm definitely in the same ammy boat as you, I don't have a made horse or the money to spend on one, I don't have a big enough budget to take lessons on the regular, and I'm slowly coming to the same realization as you that it's okay. We are going our own pace in it's all okay.

    FWIW, I think you and Courage are coming along fabulously. :-)

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  4. <3 I need to embrace this philosophy more often!

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  5. I always think of you guys excelling and not the other way around. I never thought any of those points you brought up and I am always impressed every time I come out and watch you guys!

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  6. well..try not to worry about the dressage position...I've been riding dressage since I was 12 and my position is still shit LOL BUT you are taking lessons when you can and getting educated, and thats what matters!

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  7. That's better than OK! From where I'm sitting, you have a lot to be proud of. I could nitpick myself to death too (and frequently do) but this year I'm bound and determined to enjoy myself!

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  8. Yup. I am learning that it's easier to make a plan than it is to complain! Hard lessons.

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  9. Yes, I hear you! Add into that mixture, being older with health issues, keeping my horses at home, no covered arena unless I trailer out. But...I have horses, I have riding gear, I have a truck and trailer. I have a wonderful hubby who encourages me to ride and lesson and spend $$ on training. Have to remember all the horse longing people who don't have a horse. Making first level, might be a life time goal...but it least I have the tools to work towards it.
    Best wishes, Carol

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  10. I need you to speak this into a recording device so I can play it for myself on repeat.

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  11. Yep to this whole post! Having things to work on is great, but enjoying the process and not overly pressuring yourself (or your horse) is critical to maintaining the pleasure for everyone. You have such a great attitude, and its clear your partnership with Courage has really brought you both to a whole new place.

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  12. You guys are awesome!!! Yeah definitely don't be hard on yourself or him. I thought the same thing when I saw video of myself in my lesson last week "whatttttt am I doing with my hands!!???" Or the time I developed a weird head tilt in a lesson...say what? Ammys rule!

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  13. You guys are doing great! It's hard not to pick at things, as there's always something that can be improved and once as you have improved that thing, there's something else waiting for you to pick at. It's neverending, even at the highest levels :/ which is kind of depressing if you think about it for too long so don't!

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  14. This was exactly what I needed to hear :). After so much time off and so many vet bills I feel like I am so far behind, but behind what? This is a hobby and I am in no rush. Thanks for the great reminder :).

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  15. Pretty sure I was in this same mindset about a month ago. Go Ammys!

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  16. You don't give yourself enough credit! You do some pretty amazing things with that pony and like you, a lot of us can't put in 24/7. You enjoy your horse. He enjoys you. That's what matters. <3 It's all a learning experience and that's exactly why we do it.

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  17. I wish everyone had this attitude about things. Youre my hero

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  18. I love everything about this post!

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