Tuesday, September 27, 2016

The Nightmare Before Halloween (?)

If you follow me on social media (aka are not a cave troll EMMA), you probably saw this beautiful, beautiful picture last week. 
all the pretties
I've never had much in grey before, but I was clicking around the Riding Warehouse site (danger Will Robinson) and I found that the Noble Outfitters cowl neck shirt I've wanted forever. I try not to buy black shirts because I normally buy blue (or blue) everything, so I got it in grey. But that was only $27! And free shipping at $50! 

So then I looked at Roeckl gloves and they had black, dark brown, light tan, and grey. I didn't want the first two colors because my biggest problem with gloves is losing them and I have nothing tan but omg there's a grey shirt in my cart! 

And of course, now that I had two grey things, there were visions of this perfect dressage queen outfit dancing in my head. All I need was grey polos. I already have a black pad with grey trim! And black bridles! And omg my iridescent stirrups would be the perfect color pop. Found some grey polos, chucked them in the cart, got a $10 off coupon, and waited 48 hours for my prizes to show up. 

When they did, I noticed that the polos were labelled "grey ombre", which seemed cool. Ombre is super in right now I think (isn't it?). In my head, they were going to be gorgeous--a subtle fade from black to grey up the leg. Omg. Can you even? I cannot. 


And I promptly skipped out to the barn to put them on. Which was when I found out that for no very good reason, the "ombre" was simply a 12" pattern of black to greyish... and when you wrap it...
You get a freaking Tim Burton zebra, not an understated-but-edgy, deeply sophisticated interpretation of traditional dressage style.

Yeah I'll say it again. Tim. Burton. Zebra. 

It was horrifying. It was also dusk, so I thought maybe if I threw him on the lunge and took pictures, the god-awful stripes would sort of blend into a uniform steel grey or something. 

I took a gorgeous silhouetted shot of Courage cantering past the sunset, and yeah, all I can see is his freaking zebra legs.
still nope
I tried to hold off making a decision on them, but the next day when I came out the the barn and had to choose between neatly-rolled TBZ grey polos and re-rolling a gross, dirty brownish set of supposedly white polos that needed a wash desperately, I didn't even hesitate. And I was at the barn alone with no one to impress.
he's embarrassed
So uh. It's a good thing Alyssa is a Tim Burton fan because these are definitely not staying in the collection. 


  1. Agreed, those are a no go. Love the gloves, want those and the purple color too.

  2. I'm so sad about the polo wraps. I had such high hopes for them but my ocd can't handle that.

  3. First off, you're the worst enabler. But I can't wait to get my cowl neck too, hahaha. Grey is the best color.

    Secondly, I was dying laughing at this post. Poor Zebra legged Courage


    Also yes those are hideous.

  5. Oh goodness, those are rather horrifying. Not at all what I would have expected after seeing your IG post.

    Also, if Emma get Instagram who will be our resident cave troll?

  6. I don't hate the polos...but they are not very DQ-ish for sure!

  7. lolz i like my cave tho!! it's all quiet and peaceful and there are only a few bats but we mostly leave each other alone (except for that one asshole, oops.... remind me to tell you my bat story one day)

  8. Look at all these people hating on my new polos. Imma go make Tim Burton proud!

  9. Well, there goes my money...
    I've had my eye on that cowl neck sweater for a while. And now I has it! And a few other things I "need."

  10. Oh man, ombre up the whole leg would have been so cool!

  11. Love the shirt & gloves, such a pity about the polos as the rest is so lush 😍

  12. LAWLZ @ Emma being a cave troll. And oh but the grey is so pretty...the striping...not so much! But that shirt!! Love.

  13. Ooh, yikes, not the best look! I assumed the same thing you did about the meaning of "ombre"...


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