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Courage wraps up his post-injection stall rest this evening when I'm cleared to pull him out and lunge him. I've been hand grazing him every day and he's been a champion patient.

But you know.

Will he be ok? What is ok going to look like for us? Should I stress buy a brown dressage saddle?

Obviously, the #1 thing I'm concerned about is Courage's comfort level. Objectively, I know that we have just taken the first steps in terms of management. I know there are a ton of options left on the table. I know I have a fabulous team in our corner. I know that we weren't planning on showing this year anyways. I know that I'll make responsible choices for Courage.

But I wouldn't be an ammy owner if I didn't have a few he's-crippled-for-life-omg-im-the-worst-owner-ever meltdowns a day, you know?

So those have happened.

jumper show!

I also keep thinking about jumping. Which. Obviously. He will never do again. Part of me knows that we took jumping off the table a long time ago and bitching about that now is just weird. And part of me is glad to finally know why the horse always hated grids (pound those ankles, baby) and jumps (landing sucks) and why I could never get him to use his body correctly (hard pass. don't blame him).

But part of me is profoundly sad that it's gone. Because that is something I miss.

There's also the questions--when I tell people what happened, the first thing they say is almost always "so what will you do if you can never ride him again?"

Which is clearly melodramatic, because I rode him before and I'll ride him again and it's not the end of the world, though it definitely might modify our goals somewhat.

But you know. Just hit that nerve with a hammer, why don't you.

ass. poopy ass, no less.

Though perhaps equally bad is the "well many horses with much uglier legs do much harder things", which again, is true.

But like.

If Courage was one of those horses, we wouldn't be standing here right now. WHERE WE ARE CLEARLY STANDING.

or sitting. ymmv.

As the vet said about the structural stuff going on with Courage, "it's not a problem til it's a problem and then it's a problem".

So it's a problem.

And we're dealing with it.

And bay horses look kind of washed out in brown tack.

But if the right brown dressage saddle came along, it would look fabulous with my new bridle.

I mean. It's not like I need a jump saddle any more.

NQR, Responsibility, and Budgets: An Honest Look

You may have noticed that actual Courage-related content on the blog is sort of disjointed and infrequent.

bridle game strong

That is intentional.

Homeboy is developing well and his muscling looks great and he's getting pretty solid on the ground and blah blah blah. Lunging makes me want to gouge my eyes out with a rusty spoon.

But something isn't right.

He'd get bodywork and then a week or two later, be just as bad as he was before. Under saddle, he'd walk for about 10-15 minutes and then it was just tension, Tension, TENSION AND SIDEWAYS INTO THE WALL. Didn't matter if I rode or my trainer rode. Didn't matter if we adjusted a number of variables. He wasn't "naughty" per se, but he'd get more and more and more upset.

Which is weird.

A+ there captain obvious

But hey. I get anxiety and pain and wanting to murder everyone in the room or running out the door and never coming back. I really do.

And all those things scream I'M NOT OK. Language transcends species.

And thus we begin down the NQR rabbit hole.

Step One:

Routine teeth + sheath with our regular vet and talk over options.
Cost: $150 (but also it's just routine maintenance so whatevs)

I know all the manuals say you should have a relationship with your vet, which is a scary idea if you're broke ass and avoid seeing them. But. Our vet is fantastic and was more than willing to answer questions and educate.

Step Two: 

Chiropractic appointment with acupuncture vet
Cost: $80

This step isn't required, but I wanted another set of eyes on Courage. I'm still so so on acupuncture, but the most valuable thing that came out of this for me was thoughts on where to look for issues. She said front feet and hocks lit up with pain markers.

Step Three:

X-rays and Hock Injections with regular vet
Cost: $290

Initially, I was all "must change one variable at a time like good scientist". But like. If there's pain in one part of the body, the other parts are compensating for it. I decided to do the 1-2 punch and go for it. My vet is consulting with our farrier. Vet also recommended adding in a vitamin E supplement for muscle recovery and Cosequin for joint support. (We can have a separate post for me kvetching about how much I hate feed throughs, but vet said try it, so damnit we will use it.)

Step Four:

Regularly Scheduled Farrier Appointment, now with X-rays
Cost: $80 (standard maintenance)

Once we knew what was going on inside Courage's feet and front legs, we were able to make some informed choices to change his shoeing. This is the great thing about having a solid team in place--the farrier listened to the vet recommendations, looked at the X-rays, and made the changes. He also brings a wealth of experience and presented me with some more options. Basically, we can try this, but if it doesn't work/is not enough, there are other things on the table without getting too expensive or crazy.

Step Five

See what happens.
Cost: free

The nice thing with this process so far is it's not like "OMG LEG HANGING OFF AT FUNNY ANGLE MUST FIX NAOW". We do something, see if it made a difference, and then try something else. Everyone I've worked with has been very upfront about costs and willing to work with me. I'm building my own knowledge base and learning to make educated guesses about my horse.

At the end of the day, I know my horse. I even like him. I know that the way he's acting isn't right for him and I want to know what's up. I get money problems (omg trust me on that), but with the ability to space things out and know prices in advance, I can plan for costs and mitigate them.

I don't know where that leaves us--round one of injections, X-rays, and shoeing is done. Let's see what happens.

Rolex Part the Fourth: Parting Thoughts

We're going with a bullet pointed list here because 1) this is a lot of writing and 2) headcold+vertigo is not helping the higher cognitive functions.

adios

• 11/10 would go again right this minute--I had so much fun and loved the entire experience. 

Topline Leather represent!

• The people really made this for me. Well, and the shopping. If you hate people or shopping, this might not be your jam. Or your jam might be different than my jam. Either way. 

great dogs, too

• Covered seats=worth. it. For stadium at least. Especially if you're not from the special hell that is the midwest. Humidity=murder. 

stadium communal sweat pool

• I'd heard horror stories about lines and prices at the concessions, so we brought drinks/snacks and never visited the concessions. My observation was that as long as you didn't hit prime times, concession lines were fine. Prices were off the charts though. Think $10 for a drink. Yikes! 

free shots on xc tho

• Fauxbarrys (or the real thing) are a super smart idea if you ever leave pavement. That grass is long and thick and wet feet are not the funnest.

plus great shots

• Do your research! I'm a shopper, so I kinda know what stuff sells for. I got some killer deals on things I needed (gloves and shirts), did not regret buying some things that never go on sale (Eponia), and passed on things that had marginal-at-best pricing (LA MUNDIAL AND C4). No harm in paying full price if it means you're not paying shipping (or get to handle stuff in person), but gotta be smart. Or loaded. Prefer both.

yes plz

• If you're from the northwest, be forewarned that they don't really do coffee there (there=Kentucky generally). You will have to look harder to get your fix. Learn to love gas station coffee.

or drink not coffee

• A backpack or messenger bag was absolutely invaluable. I loaded it with snacks and drinks in the morning and then swapped those things out for purchases as the day went on. 

CAT BAG

• Parking is not that bad. Unless it is Saturday. And then it is THAT BAD. 

we've already walked a hundred miles AND THE CAR IS BY THOSE TREES

• Driving around the back roads and seeing miles and miles of beautiful black fences and rolling green hills was like being in fairy land. IF FAIRY LAND WAS BUILT IN HELL. Regardless, must-see experience. Plus your car likely has all-important climate control. 

Um... I think that about covers it? 

Rolex Part the Third: Hampton!

One of the things Karen mentioned when she said I could come stay with her is that I could ride the estimable Hampton.

Which like.

I post videos of me riding fairly regularly, so y'all know I am not a super amazing rider.

And also.

I have BEEN THERE when you're watching someone royally f**k up your horse and just standing there counting how many weeks it's going to take you to put them back together once they get off.

So no way in hell I'd hold someone to an offer like that. We put way too much into the giant, fragile beasts of ours to just let every internet weirdo who shows up at our house get on them.

so hampy!

I would also like to not that I probably win the award for world's most oblivious blogger because apparently everyone BUT ME knew that Hampers was "Hugenourmous" (per Andrea) and I just thought he was normal size until I stood next to him like DAMN SON. DAMN. Because he is a big, big horse.

I figured I could at least take some cute iphone pictures for Karen.

Which I did.

But with all the cookie-stuffing, ear-forward-getting, and outfit-changing, the one thing that really shone through was Hampton's hilarious and amazing personality. I'm really, really picky about horses--I don't like rude, pushy, mean, or needy. 97% of horses I interact with are a total "meh pass" for me (and the other 3% are usually indicative of my deeper personal issues, but who's counting?!).

U R GIVE HAMPERS A COOKEE

I'm trying to write this without sounding like the world's worst tinder first date, but Hampton just has this goofy personality and larger-than-life persona. He's hard to photograph because he just wants to be with you the whole time. And not in the needy-pushy-whos-the-alpha-mare sort of way that makes me INSANE but like in a friendly, perfectly adorable way.

I don't know whether he brings the best out in Karen or she brings the best out in him, but the two of them together are amazing. (Not that I wouldn't TOTALLY STEAL HIM if I had a chance, but they really have a beautiful relationship.)

...I will try to keep this going so Karen doesn't flip out and think I'm taking the Kia to Kentucky and stuffing Hampersand in the back seat. BECAUSE I MIGHT.

Haha. You didn't see that here.

Regardless, Karen popped on Hamps and did all the cool dressaging. She's all "oh I'm not a very good rider" and I'm like "yeah you super suck, other than like your perfect hands and legs that never move and excellent posture and your excellent seat and perfect outfit BUT OTHER THAN THAT..." so anyways don't believe Karen when she says those things because believe me I wish I rode like her.

And then she's like "want a turn?" and I'm like "GROND WANT RIDE PONEE YAS" because I am basically like a caveman next to all that elegance.

We shortened the stirrups and I crawled onto the giant Hampton and giggled like a pony rider. HES SO BIG.

And like.

I R WALKING

I thought I was a Hampton fan before I got on. After riding him? DAMN SON. DAMN. Legit one of the coolest horses I have ever sat on. Scratch that. The coolest. Because like I have sat on some $$$$$$ horses and not one of them was I like "LOOK A BEAR" to distract their owner and then galloped off into the sunset on. (Not that I did this either--Karen is pretty smart about where bears are and also a hella faster runner than me.)

Cough. Let me try to use words and facts here. I don't know enough to ask Hampton to do cool dressage shit like Karen does, but I can toodle around like a first-ish level dressage rider. Hampton did EXACTLY what I asked of him. He wasn't running off with me and I wasn't pony kicking him to go. He put in the effort I asked for. If I asked for a downward transition and totally dropped him and took my leg off, well...

def what you want to do with your friend's 4th level horse in front of her

But if I sat up and rode and put my leg on and looked where I was going?

like i even know what a double is for lolz

I'm pretty cautious on new horses, especially with my fresh-out-of-rehab status and total lack of fitness right now, but Hampton put me at ease and was a total blast to ride. Karen even assisted from the ground and I did my first ever piaffe!

move over steffan peters!

I don't really know how to wrap this up. I love Hampton. He is the shit. THANK YOU KAREN for putting up with my weird caveman self and letting me play with your awesome pony.

And if he disappears from your pasture, definitely don't look in my back yard.

Rolex Part the Second: SHOPPING ERMEGERD

Not gonna lie--I’ve been planning this whole “Rolex” shebang since like… November? And all along my plan looked like this:

1) Fly in Wednesday in case of delays or problems
2) Go shopping Thursday
3) Other stuff probably

and put a topline browband on Eagle Lion #achieved

Yeah not a joke. I don’t get to touch a lot of stuff where I live, so I’ve been putting aside shopping $ for a couple months now. I wanted to get a little crazy-go-nuts in the trade fair and not regret it for months afterwards.

socks

First things first. We took a selfie at the ticket booth, walked through the front gate, and BAM Rolex swag booth. I’d already peeked around the official RK3DE online store so I wouldn’t have sticker shock and I knew I wanted something Rolex-y to take home and wear forever and for always. I nabbed a fancy schmancy coat. And a hat. And a gift for a friend. And a lanyard, cuz all the cool kids have lanyards.

modeling talents provided by Leah

stubben

antares

Next up was a big, fancy outdoor tent that I have no idea what the name was, but they had a blue and orange polo belt with my name on it. Also an excellent British guy on staff who can take a pretty solid joke, which is good because one of us is sometimes awkward. #notsayingwho #itsme

eponia

Then we were following a hot tip about a sale and going as fast as we could to the indoor, but I possibly saw a whole tent full of fancy leather halters and remembered I needed to ask some halter questions. I stepped in the booth and started asking questions about a product they didn’t have in the tent and then all of a sudden I was handing over my credit card and apparently that happened. They say it will be at my house within 30 days.

We were still following the hot tip and made it almost 100 feet before we found the Perri’s tent. I was just standing there while Leah and Karen shopped for whips and I still ended up spending $30 on two new lead ropes for my newly ordered custom halter.

so many options!

Then we were like DAMMIT HOT TIP and made it all the way to the Horseloverz tend. I’ll be the first to say I’m not a big fan of the company in general because their shipping/pricing/website irritate me, but I also got another color of my favorite Noble Outfitters base layer for like $6 so yeah that was good.

options!

Let’s see… I think I made it the rest of the way around the upper level of the indoor without buying anything. No wait… there was definitely a Mango Bay purchase (Clearance belts for $9.50). Leah and Karen nearly talked me into a new dressage whip (since mine is actually like… 15 years old), but I didn’t want to take it on the plane (which ended up being a good decision because holy hell).

shad!

husky!

I also snagged three sets of cool boot socks. Ummmm helped Karen and Leah try stuff on at the Annie’s booth. Signed up for every single possible giveaway. Talked to the La Mundial people about custom boots (but did not indulge). We wandered back through the tents we skipped the first time out and ran into Liz and Austen (and I knew Austen needed a snaffle bridle) and that ended up in a repeat trip to the Eponia booth (also note 20 tack ho points award to me for getting Austen to both look at something and buy it).

Which uh.

oooooo brown patent

I saw this. Arm modeling courtesy of Liz.

You’ll be pleased to know I did not buy that. I just went back to the car and took a swag picture and sat in the sun with my friends and appreciated what an amazing moment it was.

day one haul

Then I went home and dreamed about said bridle and so yeah trip #1 of Friday morning was straight to Eponia to buy said pretty. Do I need a brown patent bridle for anything? YES YES I DO. I made Leah shop for a brown dressage saddle for me while I was driving to the Horse Park even. (No luck yet, but I’ll keep you posted.)

yesssss

damage done before 11am

Friday’s haul included a trip to the stubben tent (holla to my girl Carly for the heads up on $3 bits) (plus they had $29 leather draw reins) (and $8 grab straps) and another tent I don’t remember the name of but hello $30 Roeckls. Then Renate showed up booze-less, so I gave her a Mike’s and sent her to Annie’s with Leah.

the ever-dangerous annie's booth

Noted: Renate knocked this one out of the park. We also snagged sweet sweatshirts and socks from The Plaid Horse (thanks Amanda!). Bliss of London had a teal hat giveaway so yeah got one of those too.

so sad she didn't buy these

Saturday I definitely didn’t need to spend any more money, but we took Jen shopping. Leah kicks ass at digging through bins of shit and while looking for a Connor halter, she found my dream convertible leather grooming halter for $30. I got a lead rope to go with it because obviously.

day two haul

Sunday I helped Karen find a half pad… and I actually think I might not have purchased anything this day. Unless we’re counting hard soda, which I definitely did purchase.

um yes need this cat bag

Monday I also didn’t purchase anything but did totes steal Karen’s awesome cat bag that served us faithfully on cross country day.

Buckley approved

Annnnnd I think that about covers it? Maybe?

yesssss