Achievement Unlocked

There's no question that my smooshy baby horse is a very special horse. The whole point of that "ruthlessly exclude" ethos and enlisting particular people to help me find her was to find the creature who fits my life right now.

And like. 

the only reason she didn't buck me off is cookies

I thought I knew what I was doing, but life is never quite what I expect. The little lady went from twice a week training backed up by 2-3 days a week with me to not anything. I dropped her out of training (because money is a thing) and quit showing up to the barn (because jobs are a thing) and since early this spring, she's been on a 1-2 toodles a month schedule. 

can you even with the cuteness level here?

But then September came around and I a little bit got my shit together. 

For the past 3ish weeks, I've been riding 3-4 days a week. Which, if you know how math works, you know is not very many rides. And also--those rides were things like "toodle bareback", "meet Teresa", "practice trotting on a loose rein in the field", and "JOMPING TIME". 

ZB R TEACHES MONKEY LESSONS

Which, whatever. Reality is a thing I live in and hey, drafties are supposed to grow until they're 8 and she's 6 so no rush here. 

I guess to me, that makes it even more cool to watch what a ZB can do on this schedule. 

Once this spring, I got a wild hair and popped Zoe over some crossrails. And she was adorable. 

Then a few weeks ago, I was like "what fun, let's do that again".

remember summer?

And she was adorable again. 

And then last week, I was like "yeah let's have this be a thing" because y'know. Variety. Fun. 

<3

So yeah, that's Zoe jumping like... her 15th jump ever. Seriously. When we jump, I just put up a crossrail, pop over it, tell her she's wonderful, and move on. And by move on, I mean the first time we jumped, it was over the same crossrail like 3 times. The second time it was a different crossrail maybe 4 times, and the latest time was TWO crossrails, a total of about 7 jumping efforts.

It's fun. It's easy. It's simple. And then we leave it alone.

Remember dressage? 

I sort of do. After we'd had a couple rides this fall, I tried picking up the reins and doing that whole "riding" thing. 

in a jump saddle because reasons

She was rusty. I was rusty. Canter is definitely a work in progress because oh yeah, fitness is a thing.

maybe next year i'll learn to sit the canter

Then we left it alone, again. Next ride was a bareback toodle with no goals or agenda. Primary skills worked on were "eating cookies" and "smooshing".

We're back on our winter schedule of late night rides with my best barn buddy and the other night, before she got on, I chucked my phone at her to grab some video and hopefully get a screenshot with our fancy boots on. 

I put my leg on.

Zoe went forward.

I picked up the reins. 

Zoe moved softly into the contact. 

We stepped up into the trot. 

there actually is video buuuut guess who hasn't done anything with it

I finished that ride grinning like an idiot. 

It is so cool to be on this journey with her. To focus on the relationship and having fun and being realistic about our trajectory. To give her time to grow up and me space to live life and then start to understand that the panicked flailing and pressure and struggles of past horses really just don't matter.

Not to her and not to me. 

She's the nicest horse I've ever had. 

We're doing better than we've ever done. 

Much Needed ZB Update

I haaaaate blog posts that start out by apologizing for not blogging, so I refuse to do that to you guys. 

HOWEVER. 

Things have been happening. 

always toodling

blogger meet up!

riding lessons!

definitely my latest zany idea in progress

Plus the weather here has been to-die-for (too soon?) and so my evenings have been out doing all the things vs staring at my laptop typing away. 

There's a lot going on. Most of it doesn't belong here. 

WHAT R ON ZB

But some of it does. ZB continues to be the loveliest lady no matter what I cook up any given day. I can throw frisbees off her, hack out alone in the rain, or take trips and come home knowing that she's still going to whinny at me and be foot perfect to play with. 

I mean. She definitely has her things. 

yeah i'm growing out her mane

In a last ditch attempt to make me focus, my trainer has started semi-mandating weekly lessons because otherwise she knows I just fuck around and screw things up. Which like. She's right. And it's true. And I like lessons. And lort knows I need the help. 

Plus I don't actually have any lesson media (sorry!), but GODDAMN little lady is coming along nicely when I remember to sit up and ride. I even had a moment of being like "LETS GO TO A SHOW" right up until I remembered how much work that is. 

also my corgi stole the mrs pastures and just strolled past me like this
BRB DYING

Some days we work hard and put in the time with ground work and dressage and concentrated "training".

But a lot of days, I need to just not.

oh and a new photo editor

I hang out and breathe her horsey smell. Play with her mane. Groom her gleaming coat. Watch her munch on her favorite weeds and marvel that a creature like this is here with me.

Some things are good. Some things are not good. 

But we're here. 

Together.

Shindig

Last weekend, I took my pilfered camera to the big recognized dressage show that's local to me.

this blog is about me and my horse but since i took these pictures, i give myself permission to use them

I love hanging out behind the camera because I can take everything in while staying completely invisible.

i am trying to keep pictures anonymous though

I watched people ride beautiful horses. 

Looked at the fancy ribbons.

Enjoyed the flow of well-ridden tests. 

And I'd be lying if I said I wanted to do that right now.

Honestly, just being there made me nauseous. 

PROTECT DOGGO FROM BOOM BOOM SKY

I'm struggling to put into words just how much I enjoy letting ZB be my safe space and my happy place. I show up and just enjoy every moment with her. 

There's no pressure. It doesn't matter if we accomplish something today or tomorrow or next year or ten years from now. 

outfits always matter

I love her bold curves and zero-shits-given attitude. My hearts melts when she whinnies her daily greeting. 

She makes every day a fun adventure.

she is her own lady

Objectively, I want to show again. 

Someday.

Not today. 

Not tomorrow. 

matching sparkle hats!

From now until then, I'll just be enjoying my best lady. 

We Take a Lesson!

ERMEGERD BEBEH MARE

One of my (many) favorite things about ZB is that she's pretty damn resilient. With Courage, I had a strict protocol for how many times I had to see a trainer work with horses EXACTLY LIKE HIM before I'd even consider riding with them and since most sane people don't ride horses like him, well, it got complicated.

But with Zoe? I found out a barn friend was organizing a clinic with a trainer I'd heard of but never ridden with and I was like "hey cool sign us up!" because I knew that hey, whatever happened, ZB would be fine.

Plus I definitely need lessons.

had to get an outfit shot

Anywhoodle. I'd never met this trainer before, but she got out of the car like OMFG I NEED THAT OUTFIT FOR MY HORSE so I figured we'd get along.

Funny joke.

Actually she was like "this horse is not a super baby. She can go to work." And then expected me to like ride and shit? Pro tip: riding is hard. Especially if all you do is toodle and goof off and you are a lazy ammy.

We took a lot of LOOOOOOONG walk breaks and yeah they were a lot more for me than for ZB. (Thanks to trainer for getting ZB in shape and trained and stuff!)

Really important takeaways for me:

1) Because of her conformation, it is WAY more important to get ZB up in front and then come onto the bit vs pulling her head down to the bit. This is feedback I have gotten from every single professional who has laid eyes on her, but it's always worth reiterating.

2) Because of her disposition, it's VERY important to put LEG ON for a correction and then take LEG OFF to immediately reward. She's not a hot horse, so she needs to be sensitized to the leg. This is not rocket science, but since she's also my first not-hot horse, it's a different way to ride.

3) Effective position matters--ZB is such a different shape to sit on that my lower leg likes to just creep waaaaay back, which tips my upper body forward, which throws me out of balance. Nope. Leg at the girth. Toes forward. This engages my seat bones and keeps me balanced and actually makes a big difference.

4) Take the time to be correct--when Zoe leans in, I like to steer her out with the outside rein for an immediate correction. It takes a couple strides longer, but she is educated enough now to ask her to step out with my inside leg/seatbone (especially now that my seat bone is engaged thanks to #3).

5) The seat is an aid. This is a funny one for me--I used to have kind of a hot seat, so when I was riding hot jumpers, I spent a lot of time training myself to remove my seat from the equation or letting it be neutral. Now I'm riding a not-hot horse and the seat is an aid, so it's time to learn to use it correctly.

#outfitgoals

By the end of the lesson, I definitely thought I would die of exhaustion. However. I went in needing feedback on how to ride my baby mare and that's exactly what I got.

Can't wait for next time!

The Terrible Fives: Baby Draft Mare Style

So last year I get this absolutely fantastic baby horse who is the champion of all things baby horse. She's calm and honest and straightforward and adorable and sweet and fun and brave and yeah basically I think she's perfect.

can you even? you cannot.

But anytime I said, "she's four" to other people, I straight up got the JUST YOU WAIT FOR THE TERRIBLE FIVES.

Which like. 1) Whether or not I'm having fun with my horse does not impact the amount of fun you can have with yours, so chill TF out about that. It's not like there's a finite fun pile and my heaping portion is taking away from yours. 2) While horses certainly start to push boundaries once they understand them, the whole point of ZB is that she's not evil or fried, so while yes, some resistance is expected, it's not like she's going to turn into some horrific hellion harpie.

well i mean. this aside lol. 

Now my baby mare is the dreaded five. She's been in training for a while and she's starting to really understand what we're asking her and where the boundaries are.

I've gotten a couple texts from trainer lately indicating that ZB has been less than 100% foot perfect. Which is still like 95% foot perfect, which I think is pretty damn good.

But hey. After spending most of a week out of state, it was time to hop on and reassess what was going on.


If you're not a video watcher (like me!), here's the relevant stills:

R LOOK AT CHAMPION BABY MARE

Her good moments were really super. 

R SHOW MOM HOW ZB R CANTER CHAMPION

Yup. 

She was cracking me up. She juuuuust figured out how to put the pieces together in terms of canter being an expected behavior under saddle so now she's like "HOKAY MOM I R CANTER LIKE GOOD BABY" and then after 1-4 strides she's like "R BERRY TIRED PLZ TO STOP NAOW HOKAY". 

But like. Constantly. Before I snagged this video, I couldn't get ten strides of trot without popping into the canter. Also #babyhorseproblems, we can't really canter and steer yet. 

R NEED COOKIES NAOW

I mean, when your baby mare "acting out" is just her being proud of herself for learning something hard? 

That's basically the cutest thing ever. 

Oh and this is what her good moments look like right now:

omfg baby mare champion

I was going to write a sarcastic comment here about "too bad she's not more fancy", but again after almost a week out of town, I came home and got on my baby mare with zero prep and had a super excellent ride and yeah... ZB is the best. I adore her. That is all. 

Oh the People You Meet

I always say that my favorite thing about blogging is the people you meet. 

and the shared love of Teeny

A while back, Leah forced me to be friends with Teresa because it was inconvenient for her to have to keep up with both of us separately (or maybe she thought we'd hit it off? I guess I didn't ask). We have since all hung out with each other (notably when I invited Leah to Karen's house before even meeting either of them in person) (or when I showed up at Teresa's house literally two hours after she moved across the country), but not actually all at the same time. Yet. 

YOU COULD BE HERE, LEAH #justsaying

Anyways. Point is, I totally crashed T's party last summer and had a perfectly brilliant time, even if she was tired to the point of being incoherent and her horse randomly got the world's worst abscess (tm). And because she is a super nice person, T was A-OK with me coming back to her house this summer. So I did. (Again with the "I show up at people's houses" thing. It's real.) 

and then i used my stolen camera to take pictures of them

This time around, Gatsby was not sporting the mother of all abscesses and I actually got the privilege of watching T work with him, both at home and in a lesson. And on the trail WE WENT ON A TRAIL RIDE OMFG (details later).  

loving the reflections here
and the outfit. 10/10 i am plagiarizing that.

Point is, a lot of adult amateur life can be kind of lonely--we aren't always surrounded by people who share our passions or goals and we can't always make our schedules work and obligations to real life are well, real. I know Gatsby through T's blog and through our messaging, but hadn't seen him in almost a year. What's more, Teresa is always riding him and doesn't have a handy media person, so she hadn't really seen him go either. 

also her house is basically a storybook

It was so fun to take the opportunity to capture this pair as I saw them. They're goofy and real and high achieving and funny and curious and personable. I also definitely gave T a hard time about her screenshots--she really wasn't catching what her little guy is capable of right now, especially as he gets stronger and more balanced.

white kickboards are apparently the secret to indoor photography

Gatsby today is 100% a product of Teresa's hard work and unwavering belief in him. She's an incredible horseman and an incredible human. 

and he has an incredible tail, even if i cut her head off

AND THEN WE WENT TRAIL RIDING. 

and verily, it was awesome

Even on the trail, I was impressed by the calm, consistent way the horses had been handled. Because the trails were bad.ass. but the horses were just super the whole time.

In conclusion. Blogging is awesome because you meet awesome people. Look for ZB updates soon!

#nailedit: Training Breakthrough

I maaaaaay have mentioned the other day how I broke my horse and she completely forgot how to turn right. I possibly did not mention how toodling in a western saddle while giggling hysterically also completely broke the rest of the steering.

NOT R WANT TURN NO

GOOD NEWS GUYS.

I did some actual riding and I fixed my horse AND found a new secret way to do it.

Here it is:

1) Pick up your outside rein. Bend your elbow, close your fingers, HOLD A CONTACT, and alllllllmost think counter bend.

2) Apply your inside leg to keep your horse's body straight and connected.

BOOM.

I was so proud of myself for figuring this out.

And then I was like "wait inside leg to outside rein... have I heard this before somewhere?"

Nah it's totes new material.

i will distract you with how cute we are

I Pay A Trainer and I Like It

I am totally "that amateur" right now. My trainer rides my horse. I'm not there for it. I don't know what they do unless I ask (I don't require neurotic updates since I don't actually think my horse will kill said trainer). I barely know what she eats. I don't document every detail of every day and track patterns and obsess over every moment.

ZB R WANT OWN MINIATURE HOOMAN

When I go to the barn, I mess around. I don't even always hold on to the reins.



I spend a lot more time toodling and feeding treats and watching ZB knock shit down than actually "training".

can you even? you cannot.

Part of me justifies it by saying I don't want to fry Zoe or push her too hard. She's still a growing baby and no one wins if she thinks work hurts.

Even when I have grand illusions of showing up and like "training" or something, I'm easily sidetracked by finding a western saddle that actually fits my 55 gallon drum of a horse and then staging "Old West" looking photos in the dressage arena. (Note to self: walk 100' to the sagebrush next time you're in this mood.)

Needs windmill 

Like right now--the biggest thing Zoe is struggling with is body awareness.

I haven't started her in a 12 step program. We aren't obsessing over cavaletti and jumping small fences and whatever. I'm not freaking out at all. At. All. 

We're planning to do a bunch of trail riding this summer. 

I figure that will help her. 

photo by Courage Has Opinions

I did actually get my rear in gear and "do dressage" one day this weekend. 

omg baby mare!

Let me tell you something. 

um hellooooo

Being "that amateur" is freaking awesome. 

Her good moments are lovely. Her bad moments are sane. I get to enjoy the progress right now without being the one putting in long hours in the irons.

It's hard to explain. After 4 years of having to read every muscle twitch and ride every day and be on my A game for every moment, it is unbelievably relaxing to just... not.

hair goals

Every day, Zoebird is the horse I always wanted. She takes the stress out of horsemanship.