Struggle Bus

I've been at odds with this whole "amateur equestrian" thing lately. It sounds dumb, but I don't understand how to relax and enjoy the process and not be competitive, if that makes any sense.

I mean, it's obviously easy in the sense of "just don't sign up for shit" and I have that part dialed.

However.

I'm a super motivated and goal-oriented person. To a fault. (Example: took up throwing frisbees last year. Now a frisbee-throwing champion with multiple trophies to prove it.) I recognize that this is a character weakness as much as a strength. I mean, again, here I have this amazing horse and sure I didn't have the energy to do anything about that for a while, but I kind of do now.

yes a color-coordinated purple bag and yes the frisbees sparkle, haha

It's just that every time I tried to ride her, I struggle-bused real hard. Riding is hard. Dressage is hard. Practice is critical. Lessons are expensive. I'm too focused on perfection and too aware of my own deep-seated flaws to really enjoy half-assing it on that level. It's not fun for me to do badly, know I'm doing badly, and then continue to do badly.

toodling is pretty ok

Deep breath. This is not an anxiety spiral.

The other day, I dug a jump saddle out of my garage, put together the one brown bridle I own that I can sort-of coax on to ZB's head, and then trooped out to the barn.

does the mare need open fronts? obv
am i going to shop for them at not-rolex this month? OBV

I set up a bitty little trot pole and made myself do goofy jumper-lesson patterns around the ring. Pick up a contact. Trot at the corner. Halt at A. Trot off. Straight line over the pole. Walk at the letter. Halt. Walk off. Just whatever, keep things organized.

It was actually really funny. As we both settled into the exercise (and I committed to keeping my hands UP and FORWARD like a JUMPER and FOR THE LOVE OF GOD NOT FUSSING AT HER) (god I teach good lessons to myself in my head), ZB relaxed into the contact and gave me some really quality work.

For the first time in a long time, I got off from a ride with a saddle and felt... successful? Motivated, even. I want to do it again and do it better and I actually feel like it was productive for both of us.

awww look what a cute beebee is growing up

Naturally, I prompted celebrated this success by ordering a browband.

Stay tuned, I guess.

I Tack Ho'ed So Hard

I know, I know. Every time I say that, you think I can't top the last time I said that.

Well.

I can.

I don't even know why you doubt me anymore.

shame on your doubts

Soooooo this story starts back in January when I visited my sister and we skipped through a tack store whilst tossing dollar bills into the air willy nilly (metaphorically).

One thing I saw that many of you were like OMFG HOW DID YOU NOT BUY THAT was this:

make sexy eyes at otto!

I mean. Yeah. It's lovely. But also like a billion dollars and OH YEAH perhaps you remember how ZB fits in approximately off-the-rack NOTHING.

Plus I happen to know that the thing with Otto is that you can order custom but you have to go through a dealer and there isn't one close to me. Also one thing about me is that I have the attention span of a caffeinated gnat, so custom ordering is not in my wheelhouse. I'm an instant gratification girl.

But then you all probably know Stephanie (say with me: THAT BITCH!) who I legit hung out with at Rolex last year and one day on facebook she started this out-of-control thread about ugly custom bridles which somehow segued into her casually dropping the fact that she works for an Otto dealer.

HOLD THE PHONE.

I did what any responsible tack ho would and casually filed that information away for later.

every day is a good day for rolex pictures

lol jk this is me

I immediately messaged her every detail of what I wanted and asked what it would cost.

She for some reason didn't think I was a tire kicker and got back to me all polite and professional and told me the cost.

We'll leave it vague, but let's just agree that it was enough that as a seasoned tack ho who's used to paying for quality, I most definitely threw up in my mouth and was like NOPE HARD PASS LOL WE ARE NEVER EVER EVER GETTING THAT TOGETHER.

Buuuuuut

Once you know

And you've had some time to get used to it

And then you think about your life without it

I mean.

The mare legit doesn't fit in off the rack sizes, which means 1) finding things for her is impossible and 2) impulse buying strap goods is dead. Also she's the nicest horse I've ever had, so doesn't she deserve the nicest bridle?

And you know. I'm not showing this year, so what better time to buy a ridiculous bridle than now when I'm not paying entries and memberships?

logic. we has it. 

I messaged Stephanie something mature like YOLO (after several weeks, I'll have you know).

Then the wait began.

I was super patient for like the first 38 seconds.

Then it was pure torture.

I think Roxie's (and Halo's!!) mom got so tired of listening to me that she sent me a link to a purple padded FSS bridle for pennies on the dollar on eBay, which I most definitely bought to kill time.

again with the photo edits

I waited. I waited more. THERE WAS SO MUCH WAITING.

THEN ONE DAY

DROP IT LIKE ITS HOT

THE WAITING WAS OVER

I MEAN NO DEFINITELY DONT DROP IT

BRIDLE PARTAY

Except it also wasn't over.

DO YOU SEE IT

SOBBING

I was hoping to hold off on writing this for a while and be like "everything is awesome!" but it's been a week+ and despite repeated attempts to reach out to Otto, I don't have a firm plan or a ship date for the correct browband and it's leaving a sour taste in my mouth for sure.

I mean. I may be small potatoes to Otto himself, but I didn't pay $$$ for a custom to bridle to get *almost* what I wanted.

mmmm classy

Bright side: I managed to finagle my topline leather browband on and it does look fabulous. And I'm obsessed with the bridle. And it's exactly what I wanted (other than the browband). And it looks fabulous on ZB.

taking a bridle picture
wtf is zb doing

hi zb

yeah now it's not a bridle pic

So anyways. It's in progress and after waiting as long as I did, I am not thrilled to be waiting longer.

Otoh, the bridle is gorgeous and I do not regret a cent.

#goshopping

Vote for Your Favorite ZB Bridle

Here is a fact that often surprises people about me: as much as I love having ALL THE TOYS for ZB to play with, I actually super respect people who can have just one bridle and be happy with it. 

R WANT NAP INSTEAD OF CHOICES

Sometimes I even pretend like I could be one of those people and consolidate (aka bring my spares home to stick in the bridle bag), but that generally lasts like an hour, because I find things I forget I had when I put things away so then those things go to the barn and it sort of spirals out of control from there. 

All that aside. 

Here's a quick rundown of the current bridle stock (not including one I got tired of looking of a picture for that does exist and presumably fits). Remember all browbands are interchangable. 

Which one do you think looks the best?

1) Retro Otto Schumacher White padded bridle 

 I picked this up a week ago (uh time flies!) for a killer deal. It's size 3, which fits everywhere except the cheeks. Because this is me, I stuck a different set of cheeks on it and here we are. The white padding is nice in a dark indoor. The leather smells amazing. It's in shockingly good condition for it's age. The price was such that I can abuse this as a schooling bridle and feel no guilt. It's a crank. It has a flash. i can take the flash off and leave the crank loose to minimize the amount of buckling I have to do.

2. Single Raised Tony Slatter Bridle (currently with Topline Leather browband)

This is not a brand I was familiar with, but a barnmate was selling it and let me try it on ZB and basically as soon as I touched it, I was sold. The leather is stunning. The fit is excellent. It's a plain cavesson, which is about the number of straps I have the energy for. If I'm being picky, the reins are a little short for ZB, but I haven't swapped them out yet because I like touching them. On the whole, this is an excellent quality bridle that is uncomplicated to use, and the single raised is classy on her.


3) Highly Custom Nunn Finer Event Bridle in black/stainless (also shown with Topline Leather browband)

This is the first bridle I bought ZB and I'll probably never be able to sell it because WTF cob size cheeks on an OS headstall. Well, and I'll never want to sell it because it's simple and classic and easy and doesn't have a crank or a flash and can be beat to death and still be acceptable in mixed company.


4) Large horse size Micklem with (different) Topline Browband

 In fairness to me, I don't actually own this bridle. A friend sent it to me to mess around with and either keep or sell. I could tell you a long story about why I've now had it for like 6 months and done neither, but the essential points are that 1) I still have it 2) I don't love it and 3) hey look something off the rack went on ZB somehow!


4) Mark Todd bridle with Dark Jewel Designs browband

 I've blogged about this bridle before. I hang on to it for sentimental reasons and i definitely expect it to be back in the rotation this summer. In a strange twist, it's the only brown piece of tack I own right now. Well, sort of co-own. It's complicated. But beautiful.


5) Red Barn Piaffe Bridle with Black Jak Refinery browband

I had a massive tack ho crush on this bridle for a long time before I bought it. It's a really fun design. It fits (in regular horse size wtf) and the self-colored padding keeps it just this side of conservative. If I'm being picky, I hate doing a crank/flash on the daily, but I also want to keep this as my show bridle. (Ignore that I'm not showing right now) (Also ignore that I loathe new leather and this needs to be broken in).

Help me out blogosphere! If I'm attempting to narrow down which one bridle lives at the barn, which one should it be?

ZB: The Wild West Saga

The last month I owned Courage, I went on a western kick and bought a bridle and a saddle. The saddle of course fit ZB somewhat like a banana boat on the top of a hill.

pictured: rocking chair

So obviously that was never going to work.

HOWEVER.

The bridle. Omg. I was super duper in love with it and I'd LITERALLY JUST BOUGHT IT and the advantage to living where I do is that custom western stuff is super accessible. 

I took this bridle to a shop that's like a mile from my house:

And one highly custom throat latch later, I had this:

well and upgraded slobbers straps #hosgonnaho

Of course, given the saddle situation, the western bridle was mostly relegated to bareback days. 

i said mostly

BUT

OMG

The other day, I walked into the tack room and was greeted by this glorious sight:

UNKNOWN. TACK.

I tracked down the owner, got permission to play with the saddle, and. Well. 

me: the light is perfect
me: ZB strike a pose
ZB: R WANT LOOK OVER THERE

See, once you have the set up all ready, it's time to get on and ride. 

boom. western zb.

Here's a wee secret about me: I am completely terrible at riding western. 

It's never been a part of my daily life. I super admire those people who just effortlessly sit there and flow with the horse and look like they were born in a stock saddle, but those people are so not me. I'm an obsessive detail person who is like HOW DO I WESTERN

The best feedback I've gotten was this: 

"Just. Stop. Doing. That."

STOP DOING WHAT?

"Whatever the hell that is." 

Curious? 

NOW ITS ON VIDEO.

I think it's best described as some sort of hunter perch with my hands singing a discordant duet of FALLING FREE FALLING. Who knows. Props to ZB for being a major sport and just letting me do whatever the hell that is.

Maybe I'll figure it out. Maybe I won't.

The important takeaways are these:

1) ZB is stinking cute as a western pony.

2) We look super legit as long as I don't get on

3) CHECK OUT WHO IS BOSS AT DITCHES

uh possibly we have our own way of doing them

Hos Gonna Ho (Part 582,671)

Well. 

So.

A lot of you are being all "frugal" and "admirable" and "responsible" and saying shit like "oh yeah totes not shopping because of [insert adulty reason here]".

I would never presume to denigrate that sentiment because we are all on different journeys and your path might not be isn't mine.

I do respect your choices though, and I want to demonstrate that to you by sending all the things I thought about lately and REALLY WANTED but DID NOT ACTUALLY BUY. (Well ok I mean not "all the things" because that list would be daunting, but here's a good sampling of things I wanted to pull the trigger on BUT IN FACT DID NOT).

This TOTES GORG blue stripe set from PS of Sweden

This BLOODY BRILLIANT set by Le Mieux

This trophy I clearly deserved

This horse statue

this to-die-for OS purple double ombre patent leather Otto Schumacher browband

Or the thoughtfully-detailed matching custom purple Otto Schumacher bridle

Even though there was a DROOL WORTHY Mattes pad to match

and none of these hats

not this jackalope

nor these highly-appropriate socks

I know you're sitting there like "omfg SB! You are a model of frugality and moderation!", to which I'd say in the face of such temptations, I did pretty damn well. Particularly given how bad I wanted everything Otto.

One or two of you might be like "but think of poor ZB! She has almost no things at all and she probably doesn't even think you love her and and DIDNT I SEE A SWAG BRAG PIC ON SOCIAL MEDIA?"

Well yes. I just wanted to be sure you understood that however much money I may or may not have spent at a tack store, it was still far, far less than it might have been. (Particularly if Otto had just jumped off the rack into my pile.)

yeah this pic

I traveled to a city with a big local tack store. I knew I kind of wanted a particular set of boots for ZB and I kind of had an inkling that I wanted to touch halters. I took my (total shopper) sister with me. Girl doesn't know horses but she knows shopping and quality.

That escalated quickly.

I mean, it started pretty innocuously. I found a pair of Kerrits gloves on clearance for like $10.

Put it in the pile.

also pictured: excellent taste in socks

Plus then there was a $90 pair of Majyk Equipe hind dressage boots in white on sale for $25, and I'd be stupid not to get them. (Pro tip: admitting the truth to yourself that your drafty baby needs large front boots and XL hinds might sting initially, but you can find killer deals on dinosaur sizes.)

So they went in the pile. 

...don't overanalyze this

Then it was grooming basics--hard to say no to a purple tail brush and matching curry mitt. Just a couple of bucks, right? 

PILE. 

I touched saddles (they comically topped out at a wide, which like, giggle snort, ZB could maybe wear as a hat except her brain is real big too) and taught non-horsey sister about French vs German vs English leather. She is now a French snob. 

Then we played with bridles and I DID NOT buy the loooooovely edgewood that was screaming my name. I waltzed right past it into the leather halter section. 

(See how many things have not gone in a pile?) 

this was tasty

I'll be honest and admit I've never had a Walsh halter and that I've been drooling on them for years and that I have a massive tack boner for flat raised fancy stitch nosebands and that havana leather is my favorite color of leather and that I hate adjustable chins and love nice halters. 

And I don't know, a fancy stitch Walsh halter just sort of fell into my hands. 

You guys. 

It was real beautiful. 

I was just trying to keep the drool off it and sort of stumbling back towards the rack to hang it up and newly-converted-leather-snob sister snatched it out of my hands and was like PUT IT IN THE PILE. 

And I was like "but $!" and sister was like "EVALUATE PILE LATER", so we moved on to the boot section. 

spoiler alert

I touched some things, and then I saw what I really needed. 

I've been in love with those Equillibrium bumpy polo boot thingys since... hahaha. Well. I had mixed feelings on them until I got to play with Karen's and then T and Leah can tell you that I won't shut up about them the lately. 

And remember how I'm learning to accept that my baby horse is kinda giant and needs dinosaur clothes? 

It puts the boots in the pile or it gets the hose again. 

spoiler alert #2

I WILL HAVE YOU KNOW that I then looked at polos and bell boots and helmets and breeches and human clothes etc and added NOTHING ELSE to the pile (that I currently remember). I mean, this was when I spotted purple Otto and browband, but I didn't even let myself touch that for fairly obvious reasons. (Plus leather-snob-sister probably would have had to point out that Otto bridles are way too much $$$ for the quality. Killjoy.) 

Fortunately, my pile-analyzing skills are super fly, so I carefully went through item-by-item and then was like #YOLO and bought the whole thing. I mean. I thought about passing on the lonely pair of ME boots, but it seemed irresponsible not to buy them. 

plus they fit so nicely in the cat bag

And that is the story about how while it might LOOK like I spent a shit ton of money at a tack store, it was really WAY LESS than it could have been. 

Plus omg. The pretties.