Monday, January 30, 2017

IT RIDES THE HORSE

Back when my car acted as a mechanical brake for a much larger truck, the doctor told me I wouldn't ride for a while and I was like "BLAH BLAH BLAH I AM MOCKING YOUR OVERLY CONSERVATIVE DIAGNOSIS". 

Cough.

That was December 2. 

I didn't sit on a horse again until January 20, at which point I realized my physical therapist was not kidding around about my body not working, which I guess I'd already figured out from how I hadn't been able to function normally in well over a month and spent Christmas on the couch in pain, but you know. Slow learner sometimes. 

My first time back on Courage, I felt like one of those inflatable punching bag-clowns that wobbles around and has no legs. 
why is there not a gif of this
Side note: if you ever get sent to PT, GO. It is the most amazing thing ever. The ninja goddess gave me my life back. 

Anyways. I worked very, very hard in and out of therapy and did all my exercises and carefully followed all the instructions because I didn't just want to ride one time--I wanted to get better and be a normal person again. 

And finally, this happened:
BAY EARS

I even made another boarder video because I was so excited that I felt good enough to get on and walk for 20 minutes. 
don't worry, i didn't video all 20 minutes

It's crazy how much can change in what was basically two months away from riding. Courage spent that time lunging and going in circles with no changes of direction to speak of. I spent them losing fitness and compensating for pain. 
you don't need a pic of me on the couch
I'm on the upswing now, but it's a long road back. Courage is a very narrow horse, but it felt like my hips and pelvis were getting stretched WAAAAAAY out because I haven't done anything like riding in so long. I'm definitely not trotting-ready. My reflexes are not there and my balance is a bit tenuous. I kept to the "safe" end of the arena and we spent a good chunk of time standing and watching the other horse go around because I just didn't feel ready to tackle a spook or a lot of tension. 

I want to just fire on all cylinders and go for it, but realistically, I can't. I'm trying to ease back into my life. 

I have to think of it like reconditioning a horse after a long layoff. We're going to walk until I feel balanced and comfortable and like my reflexes are actually keeping up. I'm going to try and supplement that with walking my dogs and getting back into pilates (carefully, but PT said it was a good idea). 

Hopefully, Courage can go back into training soon, but I don't want him getting fitter/more reactive than I can handle before I'm ready, so jury is out on that one. 

And I hate to admit it, but the stupid concussion is still slowing me down substantially. I have almost no emotional filter and I get overwhelmed really easily. I try to do one thing a day, and if that doesn't work out, my couch still loves me. 
and this teeny sassy dog loves me too
It's stupid. I hate it. I hate that I'm not the person I was and I can't do the things I used to, but that's where I'm at and that's what I have to deal with, so there it is. 
and i wore my sparkle helmet like a badass

So yes. I rode my horse and it was awesome and you should have seen the proud little look on his adorable face like "yay am riding horse again best at horsing", but I just enjoyed the moment and didn't take a picture. 

38 comments:

  1. Why would you want a gif of that clown?????????????

    Also yay riding!!!!

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    1. I mean, I hate clowns more than the next guy, but in my head, that image needed to be a gif to fully convey how useless I felt.

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  2. So glad you are back in the saddle! And your couch and teeny dog aren't the only ones who love you even on rough days 😉 for your long-term health, I'm glad you took it slow and did your recovery correctly. Hooray for the return of Aimee and C-rage riding media! 😁

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    1. Yes. I also have friends who tell me to go back to bed when the hate list gets too long. :-p

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  3. Feel bettter, you're right to take it very slow. Head injuries are no joke, but it does get better! It just takes awhile. Worst thing you can do is get another by losing your balance by accident <3. Speaks from experience <3

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    1. Figures this all coincides with the worst winter we've had in decades. The falling down thing is a real risk.

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    2. It is! I've had a few bumps to the head, but my sis fell on XC hard...6 weeks of no riding/rest...hopped on her horse, first ride back, he tripped trotting in warm up and she came off again because her balance still wasn't 100%...this time hospital + a few days of memory loss! Scary! Stay safe on the pony and behind the wheel too <3

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  4. Yay for saddle time! In any capacity, it's always a good thing :D

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  5. Hooray! So glad you're back in the saddle but taking it slow and easy

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    1. I wish that was because of my great restraint rather than actual physical problems. :-/

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  6. Awesome, glad you are back!! I've had a couple concussions before and they really do set you back for a while. Hope you get stronger and stronger!

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    1. I really think the concussion is the worst part. You can't see the damage and it creates havoc in day to day life.

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  7. Slow progress but moving forward nonetheless - don't push yourself too hard and be safe! Thinking of you!

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  8. first: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SwHETnBT1Tw (not a gif but maybe the same idea?)

    second: so glad to see you back on the horse!! getting back on after breaking my leg was.... hard. emotionally and physically, esp accepting that it was going to take a while to build back up my strength and ability as a rider (which, arguably, due to life circumstances and such, i'm perhaps still not the rider i was before that accident...). still tho - it's much better to be back at the whole "working ever onward for progress" thing instead of "on the couch in pain." yay recovery!!!!

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    1. After clicking a series of links, I determined that there is a desk size punching bag clown. I am dangerously close to owning one.

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  9. Yes!! Congratulations!! I was so excited to get on for the first time after my accident. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels like a wobbly inflatable punching bag with no legs. So happy for you!

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    1. It is not a reassuring feeling at all. Yay physical therapy!

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  10. It yes good to be back in the saddle. It will come faster than you think.

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  11. YAYAYAYAYAY! Glad you are back in the saddle and Courage isn't being a twit:)

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  12. I remember trying to come back from my broken leg (four months non-weight bearing... not even a toe touch!) It felt like I would never get back to my old self. You are so right that PT is important and helpful and great. Here's wishing you a speedy and complete comeback!

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  13. Yay! Happy that you got back in the saddle...things will get better! Wishing you a quick recovery!
    www.baysoverbaes.wordpress.com

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  14. Concussions super suck and are stupidly exhausting. I'm sorry you're having such a rough go with yours, but hopefully you'll continue to mend quickly from here! In the mean time, I'm so glad to see that you're finally back in the saddle!

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    1. Ugh yeah I had no idea. The concussion is definitely the worst part.

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